Mark Schaefer & Patrick Miller - Speakers
Try to keep up as this dynamic pastoring duo of Water's Edge Lutheran Church in Frisco, Texas, jumps through scripture with more enthusiam and energy than anyone you've ever seen. Get ready to get smacked in the face with Jesus-centered biblical teaching that just might change your life forever.
The pastoral ministry sure has changed in the years since I said "I do." In my day, we would have never posed for a picture like this. Then again, we were pretty miserable guys - not like these fellas who seem genuinely gay and happy. But I may be old fashioned, but this kind of thing just has a queer look to it. It doesn't seem dignified. There's just something fruity going on here. I guess I'm used to a more "straight arrow" kind of image rather than these ambiguosly-dressed pastor buddies from San Francisco, Texas (and all this time I thought it was in California - which goes to show you kids what happens when you sneak a hip flask to sixth-grade geography class).
But I gotta tell you, if one of these guys smacked me in the face, they'd be spitting chicklets. That's one thing I don't cotton to with this whiny and pierced generation. They may think real life is like a video game, but it ain't. If "Ace" and "Gary" want a piece of Scuttlebutt, they'd better drag themselves out of the closet and take their poundings like real homo sapiens.
Now, if you'll all excuse me, it's time for my union-mandated nicotine break, and if there's one thing I never miss, it's a "fag."
So who's the idiot at the Seminary who says these guys are suitable enough to be certified as pastors?
ReplyDeleteJa well, those two would have gotten along great with a certain corporal in my old Bavarian artillery regiment back in the "War to end all Europe"
ReplyDeleteThanks for your service, even if you were on the other side!
I more than agree...if these guys aren't poofs, who is? Their services must be jolly interesting!
ReplyDeleteWe love your site
Chris in NJ
From the water's edge website:
ReplyDelete“Water's Edge is a Christian Church striving for an atmosphere that is genuine, inspiring, and empowering. You will find our growing faith family to be made up of real people, processing the struggles and victories of life through the filter of Jesus' love and forgiveness. The wisdom and insight of Gods' Word takes center stage at Water's Edge, and is communicated in a manner that is understandable and engaging. Since God makes it clear that He intends His Word to be understood and encountered by all, we strive for just that.”
'The love and forgiveness of Christ is a filter-'must have been asleep the day we covered that in Pieper's Dogmatics. 'Wisdom and insight of Gods' word takes center stage,' I'll bet the Holy Spirit was tickled pink to have Jesus move over and stop hogging the show all these centuries.
"Understand and encounter God's word," is that like Annaias and Sapphira's encounter with it, or Adam and Eve's encounter with the Word, or...? God intends it to be understood? That must be why he spoke in parables and then had to explain them.
And it goes on: “At Water's Edge we strive for an engaging and faith-strengthening worship environment. We purposely host worship services that are celebrative and upbeat, yet also orderly and instructive. Within our 60 minutes of worship, our Pastors lead us through a variety of purposed worship movements, all which focus our hearts on the forgiveness and wisdom of the living God. We are thankful that God has richly anointed our Pastors and Worship Leaders to deliver the Word of God to us in life-changing, heart-felt ways, and we pray for them to be as creative and engaging as possible.”
The last time I had a purposeful movement during Worship my mommy took me out and changed my diapers. "We pray for them to be as creative and engaging as possible.' How about praying for your pastors to be faithful to word, sacrament and their ordination vows? Nah, creativity and holding my attention is more important.
'Faith strengthening worship environment'-I thought that is what the body and blood of Christ were for-silly Jesus, didn't you know that all we needed to increase our faith was a comfy place to sit and some catchy songs to clap along to?
'Scuze me folks, the General has turned on the smoking lamp and I'm going to join him, just to get the taste of Saccharine out of my mouth.
That deserves two snaps, a twist, and an ELCA blessing!
ReplyDelete