Look at the fella on the right side of the buffet. Is that Weedon? The Weedon? The Weedon who has written more quotes from Augustine than Augustine? The acolyte of St. Atkins the Carnivorous himself, scooping out blobs of artificially-colored yellow carbs?
And what is with that tie? Judas Priest! We have been deceived. My sources tell me Wee Willie Weedon uses his cassock as a bath robe and mows the grass in his chasuble. But here we see the unvarnished truth about the high-church Romanizing self-proclaimed Patriarchs of Constantinople known as the Socialists of St. Polyanna. I just knew the rumors I heard about them were all wrong. Cripes, Paul McCrain even wrote them off as only having "less than five" members. Maybe the wearing of a tie and bellying up to the buffet is a secret sign of membership. If that's the case, there could be thousands of these yoyos on the LCMess Roster of Clerical Errors. Your DiP may even be one - kinda like the Masons. Scary stuff.
I think they're a secret cabal of macaroni-eating bronzies working the church-basement circuit looking to get elected to district offices - which explains their thing for incense. It's about building up immunity to the smoke-filled room!
Aha! Weedon, you cad! I've got you and your friends now! Surrender before I take the ultimate step and send this photo to Otten.
Ack! I've been found out.
ReplyDeleteActually, that fellow is MORE than a wee bit too heavy to be Weedon. Whatever you say about St. Atdins, he knows how to keep the weight off! :)
And I have one tie I wear sometimes. It has the daily office from an illumined manuscript on it.
Now, General. This time you've gone too far - you've stepped on my toes.
ReplyDeleteHow dare you spread the scurrilous lie that the Society of St. Polycarp is a bunch of Romanizers? Why, we've only had one member swim the Tiber. We did have another brother who received a letter from a certain "Pastor Ratzinger" praising him for one of his books. But other than that...
Look, we've had at least eight times as many guys go to the Eastern Orthodox.
Romanizers? Ha!
Macaroni? Incense? I've always been voted as 'Most Likely To Cross the Tiber.' Problem is, I can't swim, and I ain't never been to Rome.
ReplyDeleteThis sounds like a fun group. If it rankles the chain of old McCain, then I want to be member number six. Of course, there would have to be some bourbon there, for medicinal purposes, of course.
Cally:
ReplyDeleteIt's dirty and filled with Eye-talians. Besides, the pizza's better here. Might as well stay put.
Holly:
ReplyDeleteI guess I'm gonna have to stop that check I wrote to Pastor P**l M*C**n for secret information. It figures he's feeding me false info to make me look bad.
I really need a better class of informants.
Every time I ask Weedon about the Polyanna Society he just laughs and gives me a mile long list of obscure theological quotes from Ahab the Bedouin Monk or Zorba the Greek Bishop.
I already swam the Tiber -- out.
ReplyDeleteCracked me up watching JPII's funeral -- fourth longest pontificate in history, they say, and when I was there no-body except for the Poles and some academics had even heard of the guy!
I wouldn't worry about the SSP being Romanisers. Hell, they don't even have a third order regular yet. I don't think they even talk about secular versus regular clergy!
I'd join except I don't think I could hack saying I'll do the Office. Unless I have another kid. That's how I read the BofC, between feedings of my first son, born when I was 46. He was Lutheran before I was, baptised August of 96 and I professed in December, then the next month the synod booted out the pastor, though I think it was unrelated. That was WELS. You think St Louis is wild? After Rome and Milwaukee, a walk in the park.
Judas H Priest -- retirement, what's that? Well, I'd better get to Target to pick up some things for my room at Blessed Reformer
The goods on Weedon? Just praying Nagelese sinks in and he completely gets the extra nos forensic Christ Crucified for us, and so abandons the "Finnish" Luther + EO ecumenical bridge of a sanative understanding of Justification which he so foolishly admires. But of course, Chemnitz ("The Second Phillip") didn't exactly help things, and it would take dispelling the assumption that Luther's Christology was completely Cyrilline, which it is not. Sure, the emphasis on the Unio Personalis was similar, but the closest-yet-not-exact one to Luther's distinctive TWO-Way Communio Naturarum (and thus implicit Theopascism--i.e., a Genus Tapeinoticon in which the Divine Nature shares in the attributes of the human nature just as much as the other way with the Genus Maiestaticum) was the Nicene-era Monophysite (so-labeled unfairly) Phillip of Mopsuestia. Anyways, if Weedon would keep on the primary sources, rather than secondary ones, and gives up the assumption that "earlier is always better", there is hope for him and the rest of the EO romanticists in the LCMS.
ReplyDeleteAnon:
ReplyDeleteSon, why don't you come back and visit my blog again when you've actually spent a day in the trenches instead of the class room. Men, this is the Lutheran version of "speaking in tongues" and frankly, it just sounds homo.
Mr. General sir, permit me a question in reply: Which lake?
ReplyDeleteI must admit, "anonymity" is almost as wickedly fun as Psuedonymity, although equally cowardly of course. I must say, I've been called alot of things, but never a homo (but then again, I did just purchase a pair of Euro-trash style square-tip shoes, so who knows, maybe you're right.) Puzzling to me is that while I know of unknown soldiers buried in tombs who valiantly fought and died in trenches, I've never heard of tombs for psuedononymous soldiers, let alone ones who've fought in the trenches and got blown up to unrecognizable smithereens. I mean, what use would their dog tag be if it bears a Psuedonym? Wouldn't you agree, son?
Don't get me wrong, you are hilarious and I hope you keep using your Psuedonymous tag for the benefit of readers such as myself, although I hope you never mistake a blog for an actual trench.
Mr. General sir, permit me a question in reply: Which lake?
ReplyDeleteMight we be mistaken in equating "fighting in the trenches" with writing under the safe cover of a pseudonym on a blog? But hey, if you were to deem your writing of hilarious ad hominem satire as simply being a blog-version of a "Hollywood Canteen" whose purpose is simply to lighten the heavy hearts and boost the morale of those who actually are fighting in the trenches without the safety of any cover, then by all means, I hope you play on!!!!
As for sounding homo, well, come to think of it, I was "in the Navy", but no one ever asked, so I didn't tell. But then again, I did recently purchase a pair of Euro-trash style square-tip shoes, so who knows? Maybe you're right.
Have a nice day, "son".
Anonny:
ReplyDelete"In the trenches" means doing real ministry, not rehashing class room theology like a parrot.
I'm gonna let you in on a secret, son. You the rest of you, don't read this: writing a blog is a hobby. It ain't real ministry. It is something to keep my fingers from rotting away in arthritis while I enjoy a beverage and a smoke.
Which Lake? I don't care as long as you jump in it.
Look, son, if you like what you read here, keep reading. If you don't, keep walking.
Life ain't that complicated.
Now get a hair cut and a job!
People should read this.
ReplyDelete